


second chances

by Cypherr



Series: MCYT agere oneshots [8]
Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Age Regression/De-Aging, Awesamdad is my new friend, Canon-Typical Violence, Child Neglect, Creeper Hybrid Sam | Awesamdude, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family Fluff, Flashbacks, Found Family, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, I should be doing algebra rn but fuck it, Non-Sexual Age Play, Panic Attacks, Phil really sucks here y'all, Platonic Relationships, Ram Hybrid Toby Smith | Tubbo, SHIPPERS DNI, TommyInnit Angst (Video Blogging RPF), TommyInnit Has PTSD (Video Blogging RPF), awesamdad, because c! Phil is a bad parent, except that I DO, friendship ended with SBI, i don't make the rules, only the characters that they portray, so does techno, this is not a representation of the content creators themselves, yeah Sam has four arms
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-02
Updated: 2021-02-09
Packaged: 2021-03-13 21:01:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,566
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29160069
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cypherr/pseuds/Cypherr
Summary: Maybe, if Phil had actually bothered to get to know Tommy, he would have been off-put by his sullen nature, but he hadn't. He walked off, nearly jogging, really, and took off to the skies- likely back to Technoblade and his replacement, Ranboo.
Relationships: Cara | CaptainPuffy & Awesamdude, Cara | CaptainPuffy & Toby Smith | Tubbo, Cara | CaptainPuffy & TommyInnit, Sam | Awesamdude & TommyInnit, Toby Smith | Tubbo & TommyInnit, TommyInnit & Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF)
Series: MCYT agere oneshots [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2054163
Comments: 120
Kudos: 1260





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> this fic wasn't supposed to exist?? Well, it was, just not like this. I just wanted to write an Awesamdad fic because it's my new hyper fixation, and now it's another agere fic. I really need to finish the draft that's been in my notes since DECEMBER

"...It's definitely an interesting idea, Tommy," Phil sighed, face blank and voice dead.

"Do you- do you like it though?" Tommy thought that if he did this one thing- this one, good, selfless thing- then maybe Phil would be proud of him. Maybe his father wouldn't ignore him in favor of his old student and Tommy's replacement.

"It's, uh, it's not quite what I thought those diamonds would be used for, that's for sure." Phil shuffled awkwardly, gray wings flaring behind him slightly, as if he'd rather be anywhere but here. Tommy tore his gaze to the ground, instead inspecting the blades of grass that swayed gently in the breeze. He could feel the unbidden sting of tears behind his eyes and he hated himself for it- hated _Phil_ for it. What would it take for the avian to be proud of him? He's his son, and yet, he's never been a father. Not really. Not where it counted. When it counted.

"You can go now. I'm sorry for taking up your time," he mumbled, voice bland and dejected. He couldn't even muster up the energy to be mad about it.

Maybe, if Phil had actually bothered to get to know Tommy, he would have been off-put by his sullen nature, but he hadn't. He walked off, nearly jogging, really, and took off to the skies- likely back to Technoblade and his replacement, Ranboo.

He wiped at his eyes, the tears finally spilling over and carving their way down his face. He sniffled heavily, unable to stem their flow.

It was stupid. _He_ was stupid. Why the fuck would he think that Phil would care now, after everything? It was stupid and dumb and naive, and _fuck_ , he hated himself. Phil didn't care when he left him and Wilbur in favor of adventuring with Technoblade. Phil didn't care when he lost his first tooth. When he broke his first bone. When he killed his first mob. It was Wilbur. It was always Wilbur. And maybe he deserved it. He wasn't Phil's biological son, after all- that was Wil. But, at the very least, a warm pat on the back or a 'good job' wouldn't have killed the man who _adopted_ him- who promised him a _home_.

"Tommy?" There was a hand on his shoulder, then, large and heavy with a four fingered grip. He didn't have to turn around to know it was Sam.

He allowed himself to be gently spun around and for the hands that scrubbed viciously at his eyes to be pulled away with care. He couldn't bring himself to make eye contact, though. Not while he looked so _childish_.

He'd never been a pretty crier. His face got all red and blotchy, his eyes puffy and rimmed in a faded crimson, and there was always snot dribbling out of his nose like a faucet.

"Oh, Toms. What happened, bubs?" Sam sounded so _kind_ and _caring,_ ~~like he'd imagine a father would sound.~~

Now he just felt _worse_. Not only was he crying like a little bitch over something that _hadn't ever changed_ , he was forcing Sam to deal with him. Tommy just shook his head, unsure how to express all that he wanted to say- from telling the man he's sorry, to wanting to curl up in his bed and never wake up again.

"Can I hug you?" Sam asked, voice still warm and welcoming.

When was the last time he was hugged? He- he couldn't remember. Notch, he hoped the last time wasn't with Dream in exile. That was _months_ ago.

Tommy was nodding before he had even realized.

His face was pulled into the surprising soft material of the overalls that covered the creeper hybrid's abdomen, one pair of arms around his back, the other over his shoulders with one hand in his hair. Sam was holding him tightly, but it felt _safe_. It was so unlike any hug or scrap of affection he'd ever been shown before, and he couldn't help the fresh wave of tears that poured.

He shakily reached up to hook his fingers into the green fabric Sam was wearing, like if he clutched tight enough, Sam would never leave.

"It's okay, bubs. I'm here, now. Let it out," the engineer murmured soothingly, gently circling a hand on his back.

"Why- why doe-doesn't daddy love-love me-e?" Tommy choked out around his sobs, form violently shaking with the force of them.

Tommy wasn't sure when he had slipped- whether it was when Phil had walked away after dismissing his hard work for the umpteenth time, or when Sam had _stayed_ to _comfort_ him, something no one else had ever really bothered to do. (Not when he scraped a knee or chipped a tooth. Not when he was forced through _war_ , time and time again. And certainly not after he watched his supposed father murder Wilbur, the only adult figure that ever even remotely gave a shit about him.) All he knew was that he was small, upset, and _tired_.

He wasn't sleepy, no, that would be too simple. Too easy to take care of. Instead, it was a bone deep exhaustion that had weighed on his shoulders since he gave way his discs for independence, which had only grown heavier over time.

Notch, when was the last time he had even regressed? It certainly wasn't in exile. he was too afraid of Dream using his vulnerable state against him. It definitely wasn't during Pogtopia, either- Wilbur was too crazed to be a caregiver, and he'd always been wary of Technoblade. Not to mention, Tubbo was too caught up with being a spy- not that he blamed him for that- to be his caregiver like usual.

"I- I don't know, Toms," Sam spoke, shaking the little from his spiral.

"Wanna go home," he whined, shoving himself further into the hybrid's four armed embrace, now fully regressed and feeling smaller by the second. And, it's not that he wanted to return to his dirt shack, per se, it's that he wanted to go somewhere where he was _loved_. His shack wasn't home; it was a faded memory from a past he couldn't stop clinging to.

"Okay, okay," Sam breathed, resting his forehead on Tommy's fluffy hair for a moment. "Is it okay if I pick you up, bud?" Sam asked, but his tone was soft, as if he really was giving him a choice. He wasn't- why would he do that? People didn't give him choices. Not really. He nodded anyway, knowing that people didn't like it when he didn't answer them. Why would Sam be any different? Plus, he kind of did want to be carried. He wasn't sure if he could make the walk back to his house on his own. He was too small.

"Can you wrap your arms around my neck?" Sam prompted, and Tommy complied, feeling himself be scooped up moments later. He giggled at the somewhat weightless feeling it provided, shoving his face into the side of Sam's neck, just below the edge of the gas mask he always wore.

He let himself relax into the hold as they walked, the arms under his backside and wrapped around his middle making him feel secure. He could feel the hybrid's throat rumble from where he was pressed against it, and he recognized the tune he was humming- it was the Abel sister's theme.

"Ah-b'l?" he babbled, looking up into Sam's acid green gaze.

"That's right, bud!" Sam exclaimed, although he kept his voice quiet enough to not startle the blonde boy in his arms. Tommy preened at the praise, a blinding grin appearing on his face.

It felt- it felt _nice_ to be praised- to have someone be kind to him out of a sense of want rather than a duty. Sam was gentle and reassuring, and picked up caring for him immediately, no questions asked- for both big and little Tommy.

He laid his head back down on Sam's shoulder, absentmindedly fiddling with the neck of the creeper's light green, turtleneck sweater, babbling mindlessly to himself all the while. At some point, he had begun to suck on his thumb, and the self soothing action was putting him to sleep far faster than he wanted.

He didn't want to sleep. He might wake up, back in his dirt house, all alone again, this having all been a dream. Tommy didn't want that. He was so _tired_ of being alone. He just- _fuck._ He just wanted a _real family_.

He whined, high pitched and grating, unable to express how he felt any other way.

"You're okay, bubs," Sam cooed, carding a hand through his hair. Tommy leaned into the touch, focus now completely on the hybrid. "Take a nap. That way we can play for longer when we get home, yeah?"

Tommy nodded, finally letting his eyes slip closed and his breathing to even out. The thought that his shack was much, much closer than they had been walking never crossed his mind.

~

When Tommy awoke, it was to warm blankets and a cozy bed. He, surprisingly, still felt the fog of littlespace occupying his brain. Usually, he woke up feeling big, no matter what. Maybe it was because he hadn't regressed in a while. However, it was the reason for the dilemma he was currently in. He wanted to snuggle further into the blankets he was under and never leave, but at the same time, he was small and _alone,_ and he wanted to go find Sam.

Thankfully, he was saved from making a decision by the hybrid himself entering the room. Speaking of which, where was he? He certainly wasn't at his house, and he didn't recognize the room he was in.

"Hey, Toms. How're you feeling?" Sam whispered, kneeling down on the floor next to him. With words still escaping him, he shifted his arms out from under the covers and made grabby hands. In response, he was scooped up in Sam's four armed grasp, one of the soft blankets still wrapped around him.

Tommy giggled, nuzzling his face into the crook of Sam's neck, letting his eyes slip shut and his body relax once more. He felt them start moving, the door of the bedroom shutting with a soft click behind them.

"Where go?" He mumbled, opening his eyes a crack, enough to gaze up at his caregiver.

"We're gonna go get some snacks, bud. Then we can do whatever you want." Tommy mulled to words over, excited at the prospect of spending even more time with Sam.

"Grapes?" He asked, sitting further up in Sam's grasp. Tommy _really_ liked grapes. He and Tubbo always snacked on them, no matter Tommy's headspace.

"Lucky for you, little guy, I just bought a whole bunch!" Tommy cheered quietly.

"I was thinking, and you can say no if you want," Sam started. "How about we invite Tubbo and maybe Puffy over? I'm sure they'd love to play with us.

"'Bo?" The little babbled, eyes wide with wonder. "Can see 'Bo?"

"Yeah, bud! I just have to call him, okay?"

"Puf-Puf too?"

"Of course!"

With that said, Sam set him on the counter in the kitchen, leaving him in favor of opening the fridge. Tommy wrapped the red blanket tighter around himself looking around at all he could see, taking in the new stimuli.

The countertops were a smooth andesite, and the cabinets were s simple spruce adorned with gold handles. The floors and walls were stone, but there were beautifully crafted redstone lamps hanging from the ceiling with chains.

Sam came back them, drawing him from his analysis. The hybrid had a bag of grapes, some crackers, and, what looked like, some cheese sticks. He busied himself with grabbing a plate and setting the food out on it, all easy and ready to grab.

With that done, Sam helped him gently slide to the floor and hobble over to the sitting room. There was already a sheet lad out on the ground for Tommy to play on, and he collapsed on it, sitting criss cross as he looked up at his caregiver.

"Give me one second, bubs. Okay? I've got some stuff for you!" Tommy nodded, eyes wide with wonder once more. It had been a _very_ long time since he had anything to really play with.

He sat alone for a bit, snacking on the plate of food Sam had left with him, patiently waiting for the creeper to return.

He didn't have to wait long, though, as soon, Sam returned, arms laden with coloring books and pencils, a couple of stuffies, and what looked like a few toy cars.

"I got you a whole bunch of stuff!" Sam exclaimed, riling the little up and making him giggle and clap excitedly.

Honestly, Tommy wasn't sure how Sam knew what age regression was, or how he had so much stuff on hand, but he couldn't be more grateful. It had been a long time since Tommy had felt this loved, and he wouldn't trade this for the world.

"Color?" Tommy asked, tilting his head to the side. He was presented with two books, one bordered in a lovely pink color with cartoon insects and flowers decorating the cover. The other was a pretty green, with a big, cartoonish cow. Nearly immediately, he pointed toward the one with the cow- they were his favorite animal, after all.

"I had a sneaking suspicion you'd like that one," Sam laughed as he handed it and a package of colored pencils over.

"Tanks!" Tommy smiled, remembering Tubbo always liked it best when Tommy remembered his manners.

"Of course, bud. I'm gonna go call Tubbo and Puffy now, okay?"

"Okay!"

Tommy busied himself with messily coloring any cow picture he could find- mistakenly coloring in a few horses as well- and continuing to eat the plate of snacks next to him while Sam was occupied.

Eventually, Sam returned and Tommy proudly showed him what he had been working on.

"That's very good Toms! I might have to steal a few of these to hang on my fridge!" The blonde giggled, crawling into Sam's lap to hid his face in the hybrid's shoulder. Sam cooed, running a hand through his hair, ending by ruffling it and drawing a squawk from the little in his lap. While Tommy was unbalanced, Sam took the opportunity to attack his sides, tickling the boy relentlessly, causing little giggles and loud guffaws to fall from his lips.

That was the scene Tubbo and Puffy walked in on, both unable to keep the grins from their faces.

Sam stopped his 'attack' soon enough, letting the kid breathe. The lack of distraction allowed Tommy to notice the two new arrivals, his face lighting up impossibly more.

"'Bo!" He yelled, making grabby hands towards the other teen. Tubbo rushed forward to embrace him, tucking his head into his warm chest, the brunette still clad in his Snowchester coat.

"Hey, bubba. How've you been?" The ram hybrid whispered between pressing kisses to Tommy's face.

"Stoooooop," Tommy whined, playfully, grin brighter than ever and face flushed ever so slightly.

"But I've missed you so much!" Tommy giggled at Tubbo's exaggerated tone.

"Missed you too, 'Bo." Tommy turned around slightly in Tubbo's lap, looking back over to where Sam and Puffy were watching them with soft smiles.

"Da!" He called. "Come play!"

And, well, if their hearts melted at that, nobody needed to know. (And if Tommy called Sam dad both in and out of little space, nobody needed to know that either.)


	2. scattered to the wind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It wasn't perfect, and certainly, nothing was fixed, but that could come later. For now, they healed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> part twoooooo babey  
> this one is quite a bit angstier, with some minor violence in the beginning, so fair warning for that

"Dad! Look! I got all the poppies you wanted!" Tommy exclaimed, running up behind Sam, not noticing the two men in front of the hybrid. Perhaps, though, that could be attributed to the fact he'd been bordering on slipping for a good while- all day, really. It wasn't in a bad way, no, it was actually quite pleasant bordering on the fog of littlespace, dipped in just enough to where he could let go of all his usual restraints.

Sam turned around, ruffling his hair as Tommy stopped in front of him.

"Good work, kiddo. You were a lot faster than I thought you'd be!" Tommy smiled at the praise, handing over the slightly crushed red flowers so that Sam could stuff them in his inventory for later use.

"There's a lot of flowers over in the field Tubbo keeps his bees in! Tubbs said I could get them from there!"

"That was very resourceful of you. I'm proud."

Before either of them could get another word in, Phil interjected, stepping forward with flared wings.

"What in the fuck is going on here?" He spat, eyes stormy and brow furrowed.

"Uh- I," Tommy stuttered, stepping behind Sam, grabbing onto the back of his overalls with shaky fingers.

"Tommy, son, come here," Phil sighed, lowering his wings and holding one of his scarred and calloused hands out.

Tommy whimpered, shoving himself closer to Sam, dropping into the littlespace he'd been bordering on fast, the fog now dark and stormy rather than the white fluff it had been before.

"Go 'way," he choked, just loud enough for the avian to hear it.

"I suggest you two leave," Sam growled, the telltale hiss of a furious creeper echoing with every syllable.

"I will not let _my son_ -"

"Oh, if he's your son, where the fuck have you been for the last sixteen fucking years?!" Sam shouted, body electric as the creeper in him was trying to explode, but was unable to due to his hybrid nature.

"You have no say-"

"I have every fucking say! He _chose_ me because I'm there for him! Something you've never been, you anarchist, abusive piece of shit!"

"I think you're overstepping your boundaries," Techno rumbled, finally deciding to interject himself.

Tommy stumbled back from them all, hands clutched over his ears as he curled into himself.

"Go 'way," he mumbled like a mantra, red hot tears carving their way down his blotchy face.

He didn't want this. _He didn't want this_. He just- he just wanted to show Sam that he'd been good! And then he'd get another task while Sam played with him under the guise of Sam Nook. It was supposed to be fun, like every other day! Phil wasn't supposed to be here. _Phil wasn't supposed to be here_. He wasn't- he didn't- he wanted-

Phil was standing in front of him, towering above him from his position on the ground. (When did he fall?) His great wings blocked the sun, as if he were now imprisoned, and his hand was outstretched, a gaudy, offending attempt at being 'friendly.'

"Daddy!" He screeched, closing his eyes and tucking his face into his knees. Phil wouldn't go _away_. He needed his dad. He wanted to be held in his warm arms and be told that it would all be okay- and it would be! Because his dad would be there! But- but he was alone on the ground, now, knees scraped from a fall he couldn't remember, with one of the men he feared and hated more than anything- resented with his entire being- hovering over him like a snake about to strike. All saccharine smiles and honeyed words, only to stab him in the back under the guise of a 'lesson,' when in reality, it was nothing more than neglect and abuse.

Suddenly, there was a great thump and the cut off screech of a raptor. He flinched back harshly, curling up in a ball, now completely on the ground, grass tickling his exposed skin, gently caressing the space under his eyes, and soaking up his tears like a grateful sponge.

There was _screaming_ and it was so _loud_. And then he was being picked up, but it wasn't his dad. There were no scales, or four fingered hands, or- or-

"C'mon, Tommy," Tecnoblade sighed, tightening his grip on the struggling little. "Let's go home, now. With your father."

He screeched and tried desperately to claw at the thick hide of the arms of the piglin holding him, but to no avail. Techno just held him to his chest tighter, never even flinching at his relentless scramble. In his haste to escape, he ended up kicking a dagger hooked to Techno's belt, and an idea sprung in his head.

Tommy went limp in his grasp, seemingly giving up on his fruitless fight. Believing his farce, Techno went to leave the construction site. That's when Tommy took his chance. He surged forward in Techno's slackened grip, grasping the dagger and plunging it into his side with all the forceful rage that years of war had driven into him. With a shout, the piglin dropped him, clutching the blade in his flank with a furious expression.

"You little-!" Techno started, but it was for naught. Sam surged forward, trident in hand, and scooped Tommy up, launching them both into the sky with the strategic placement of a water bucket.

"Daddy!" Tommy sobbed into Sam's chest, clutching onto him tightly, feeling the creeper hold on to him just as tight.

"I've got you, baby. It's okay now," Sam choked out as they landed in a shallow pond before they were off into the air again.

The wind against his skin was cold, whipping his hair in every direction as they soared above the land. It got icy the farther they traveled, and at this point, Tommy wasn't sure if his trembling was entirely from his fear and adrenaline anymore.

Eventually, though, they landed, splashing noisily in some placed water, the snow beneath the liquid crunching under Sam's gold plated boots. The hybrid stumbled as they moved forward, but he righted himself soon enough, and then they were off, walking through the snowy tundra, surrounded by spruce trees that strained towards the sky.

"We're almost there, Toms. It's okay. We'll be okay," Sam whispered into the top of his head, over and over, like the litany was more for himself than it was for the little. Tommy just let Sam's warm embrace and strong heartbeat keep him grounded.

"Sam?! Tommy?!" He heard someone shout, and he whimpered, burying himself in Sam's chest even further. Sam shushed him, promising him that he was alright- that they were safe, now.

There were pounding footsteps in the snow and panicked breathing rapidly approaching. He squeezed his eyes shut tight, praying to whatever Creation God would listen that he wouldn't be taken away from Sam.

"Oh bubba, what happened?" ...Tubbo?

"'Bo?" He mumbled, turning his head ever so slightly so he could peek out around the green fabric that encased his vision.

He was met with the face of his best friend, all scarred and sweater, but friendly and familiar all the same. Tubbo cupped his cheek with a gloved hand, a sad smile resting on his face as he ran a thumb under his eye, wiping at the tear stains that had dried there.

"We gotta- we gotta get inside," Sam rumbled. Tubbo nodded, brow furrowed slightly and ocean eyes alight in determination.

"C'mon, my cabin is this way," The ram hybrid called, waving them over to where he had started to trek. Sam followed silently, placating him with quiet reassurance and praise whenever a snow induced stumble would jostle him too much.

They were soon led into a cozy cabin, the floors and walls adorned with large pelts and smaller furs, with a roaring fire making the area comfortable and cozy, so unlike the frigid, unforgiving weather of the outside world.

"Hey, Tubbs! Welcome ba-" The words died in Puffy's throat, having caught sight of the pitiful state of Tommy and Sam as she came around the corner. Tubbo's face was grim, mirroring Sam's expression, and Puffy rushed forward, mind racing with endless possibilities.

"What happened?" The lamb hybrid gasped, teary eyes wide.

" _Them_ ," Sam hissed.

"Oh no," Puffy cooed, reaching forward to run her hooved hand through Tommy's matted blonde locks. "C'mere, bubs. I've got you now."

Tommy looked to Sam for confirmation that it was okay, and after receiving a slow nod, he crawled over into Puffy's awaiting grasp.

The lamb ran soothing hands over his back once she had sat down in an armchair by the fireplace, occasionally stopping to untangle bits and pieces of his hair, before returning to the circling motions. Tommy just clutched onto her red coat, letting himself finally relax as he rested against her chest, listening to her slow and gentle heartbeat. He could feel himself slipping further, all the way into babyspace, but he was too tired to stop it- too stressed to pull himself into a bigger mindset.

He stayed like that, drifting in and out of awareness, listening to the crackle of the roaring fire, and the thumps, clanks, and hisses as Tubbo helped patch Sam up.

Eventually, though, he grew hungry, having not had anything to eat that day other than half of an apple early that morning. He whined quietly, looking up at Puffy, gently tugging on her sleeve.

"What's the matter, bubs? Are you hungry?" She asked, gently cupping his face. Tommy leaned into the touch heavily, hoping it would get his point across, as the words and actions necessary to communicate his needs seemed to escape him, leaving him vulnerable and helpless.

"Oh, you're just so tiny right now, aren't you, little guy?" Puffy cooed. Tommy whined, dropping his head back onto her chest, nuzzling his face into her collar bone.

"Let's go get you a bottle, okay?" He weakly wrapped his arms around her neck, and with that, Puffy stood, carrying him into the kitchen.

While Puffy was busy heating up a bottle of angel milk, Tommy sat on the counter, idly fiddling with his hands as if they were the most fascinating thing in the world at that moment. It was then that Tubbo and Sam came into the kitchen, done with... whatever they had been doing.

Noticing their arrival, Tommy made weak grabby hands towards Sam, a low whine falling past his lips.

"Hey there, bud. How're you feeling?" Sam asked, bringing Tommy forward into a strong embrace. Tommy practically melted, letting his eyes slip shut as he listened to the strong, steady, familiar heartbeat his ear was pressed against. He let an incomprehensible string of babbles roll off of his tongue as he softly poked at the thick, white bandages that covered Sam's arms and torso.

"Aren't you just the smallest little boy, hmm? So sweet," Sam purred, running a hand through Tommy's freshly combed blonde locks.

He felt Tubbo come up next to him, grabbing his hand in his own, intertwining their fingers.

"You've been such a good boy today, Toms. You're such a good boy," the ram whispered, gently squeezing his hand.

It wasn't long before Puffy returned with a bottle of angel milk, now cooled enough to be able to drink safely. Sam picked him up- much to the ire of Tubbo, who had just spent the better part of an hour patching him up- cradling him close to his chest as they made their way back to the sitting room.

Sam sat them on the sofa, the soft furs laid atop it tickling his skin and making him giggle. Tubbo smiled along with him, helping Tommy get situated so he could be fed properly. Holding the clear bottle up to Tommy's mouth, Sam let Tommy latch onto it before tilting it up ever so slightly, watching with a soft gaze as Tommy relaxed completely against him.

The atmosphere was peaceful, a stark contrast to what it had been when they had first arrived, and even more baffling when considering that they had come here _wounded_. Sam wouldn't trade it for the world, though. He had his little boy and his fellow caregivers, and that's all he could ask for- all any of them could ask for, really. It wasn't perfect, and certainly, nothing was fixed, but that could come later. For now, they healed.


	3. big sisters and even bigger mistakes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "But we can hang out now, right? Tommy and big sis Niki, back at it again, conquering the world!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lmaooo this wasn't supposed to exist but it came to me in a dream so here y'all go. Very minimal actual Awesamdad content tho
> 
> TBH I really can't hate Niki and Jack's villain arc tho because they are LITERALLY team rocket

"Hey! Tommy! Follow me! I've got something to show you!" Niki called from the edge of the forest.

Tommy had been collecting more flowers for Sam Nook, so that the construction site could be decorated. The plain, however, bordered on a forest- the one Niki was calling from.

He quickly stuffed the pretty blue cornflowers he had in his grasp into his leather satchel, likely crushing them and staining his hands even further. He rushed over, grin bright on his face, as today was another day that he was teetering the fine line between being little and big. (If he were more honest, he'd say that he probably felt more around ten than almost slipping, but he was certainly big enough to be out on his own without supervision- to which he assured Sam. He was big enough to be able to pull himself out of it if he really needed to.)

"Hi, Niki!" He giggled, coming to a stop in front of his pink-haired friend.

He liked Niki- he really did. She reminded him of the real Wilbur, as they had been close friends that he had often teased about them being together, despite knowing the truth. It was more than that, though. Throughout the revolution, she had always gently patched up their wounds, wiping away their tears with careful thumbs, and soothing their fears with caring words. she was like a big sister to him, and he missed hanging out with her as much as he used to.

"Hey, Toms," she smiled, looking every bit as ethereal as always.

Perhaps, though, if he had been completely big, he would have noticed the malice the seemingly sweet grin held. Perhaps, he would have noticed the insanity that lurked in her haze and lined every tensed muscle. She was a cat ready to pounce and even the forest around her knew it. But, Tommy has always been far too trusting for his own good- especially in his headspace.

"I missed you!" He whined, kicking the dirt under his feet as he walked. "We don't hang out anymore. I thought that after I started spending time with Puffy I'd see more of you too, but I haven't," he pouted, watching as a pair of butterflies flitted around each other in a ray of sunlight that peaked in through the tree canopy.

"Well, you know how it is. I've just been... busy with everything since, you know," She sighed. And maybe, if he had been bigger, he would have heard the undertone of fury, but he wasn't, so all he heard was the same, crushing exhaustion that has weighed on them all since Schlatt's election.

"Yeah," he mumbled, hanging his head before perking back up a moment later. "But we can hang out now, right? Tommy and big sis Niki, back at it again, conquering the world!" So caught up in the past and the possibilities of the future, he didn't see the way Niki's steps faltered. The way hesitance flashed through her expression, and the way she clenched her fists tight enough to leave crescent shaped indents in her palm.

"How big are you right now, Toms?" She had seen Tommy little before during the revolution. He had actually been with Wilbur that time, as Tubbo was out patrolling their meager borders. He had probably been feeling about four at that time, talking Wilbur's ear off as he played with little dinosaur action figures, his favorite stuffed animal- a well worn cow named Henry- sat in his lap.

_"Wilbur? What's going on?" The then-blonde had questioned, approaching the pair laid out in the grass on a large sheet. His brother smiled wide, ease filling every bit of his figure._

_"Toms is just feeling a bit small right now. No biggie!" He had chuckled, patting the spot next to them without hesitance, inviting Niki to sit with them. She had taken the offer, although she still looked confused. But, that was okay! Tommy could tell her all about the names of his dinosaurs, and the very serious war for sweets they had been fighting._

_"Big sis Niki!" He had exclaimed, crawling into her lap to give her the biggest hug in the universe- or, well, as close as he could manage. She had melted at that, quickly picking up playing with Tommy, falling into the role of temporary caregiver easily. He was sure Wilbur explained more to her after the fact, but he had never cared. Niki was always his favorite, both big and little._

"'M big I swearrrrr!" He whined. "Dad even let me go get flowers by myself!" He showed her his satchel as evidence. "'M just- 'm just _happy,_ " he concluded, satisfied with the answer he had given.

"You're working with Phil, now?" She bit, likely faster than she wanted, as she sounded quite _rude_.

"No- uh, S-Sam," he stuttered, stumbling over himself in embarrassment. "S-Sam sort adopted me? It's not- it's not official. Not yet. But, uh, yeah," he finished, face beetroot red.

"And how's that?" Niki asked, seeming much calmer now.

"It's really fun!" He giggled, pep back in his step. "He keeps me real safe too! From Phil, and Techno, and the Egg!" The images of a wounded Sam, deep claw marks littering his arms and torso flashed through his head.

"He- he got hurt the other day, though. Like, why does Phil care that Sam's my dad, now? It's not like _he_ ever was. And then Techno tried to take me." He shivered as he could still feel the phantom, bruising grip of the piglin around him, and the way the dagger plunged into his flank with ease.

"It's okay though! 'Cause then I got to see 'Bo and Puffy, and then we played a whole bunch!"

"That's nice," Niki hummed. Her steps had slowed but Tommy didn't mind. It meant that he got to spend more time with her, after all!

"Where are we going?" He finally asked as they stepped over the threshold of snow, the icy weather nipping at his exposed skin.

"Well, that would ruin the surprise, wouldn't it?" Her smile seemed a bit strained, but Tommy supposed she was just tired like he was. They _had_ been walking for a while.

"Hmm, okay. Are we almost there, though?"

"Only a few more minutes."

Before Tommy could say another word, the sound of an explosion rang in the distance, the earth under their feet trembling. Niki didn't seem phased, the pink haired girl seeming like she expected it, but Tommy wasn't so unaffected. Flashes of November sixteenth flew through his head, the despair that had settled over him at the sight of his once-beloved country nothing but ashes under his feet. The booming screeches of the Withers spawning, and Technoblade's roar of _'then die like one!'_ ringing in his ears. He could see doomsday, see the rater as it was made, bit by bit, unable to stop it. He could see Techno, Phil, and _Dream_ celebrating the annihilation of one of the few things he had let of his older brother. Celebrated as they committed the same atrocity- only _worse_ \- that Wilbur was _murdered_ for. But, like always, it all led to exile.

He couldn't feel the snow cradling him as he collapsed into it. Couldn't smell the heavy scent of the spruce that surrounded them. Nor could he even see the world in front of him, too caught up in memoried- _living nightmares_ of the past.

He could see Dream's acrid smile, teeth just side of too sharp, a thread and a promise all in one. He could feel the sharp sting of his enchanted sword before Tommy learned to stop fighting back. He could even feel the tight hugs and soft reassurances, assuring him that _nobody_ cared for him. Above all, though, he could see his hard earned items turned into ash, day after day, the scent of gunpowder never leaving his ragged form. He could feel the way the burns it always left pulled at his skin, hardly wrapped and infected most of the time. It was a wonder he didn't lose a limb.

The detonation of TNT still haunted his dreams and his every waking hour, a constant reminder of the childhood that had been ripped away from him, time and time again. he hated thunderstorms and excessively loud noises, now. He wasn't as vulgar as he used to be because Dream had long stamped that out of him. He was scarred to the Nether and back, not emotionally and physically. And now, he was stuck in another Notch damned flashback.

_"Dream, no, I'm sorry- please-" he cried, begging the man to not tear down everything he had worked for. He wasn't fighting back- he wasn't! He just didn't want other people stealing his stuff after he-_

_"I trusted you, Tommy!" His face was covered in that awful smiley mask, but he could almost imagine the expression it hid. A furrowed brow, acidic green eyes. Maybe some freckles were dotted around- he seemed like the kind of guy to have freckles._

_"Dream, please! I'm sorry! I didn't mean it like that!"_

"Tommy!? Hey, hey, Toms, c'mon, it's alright," Niki's voice broke through the haze in his mind.

He was cold- that was the first thing he registered. The snow beneath him (when had he fallen? He needed to stop forgetting) was icy, nipping at his skin like a rabid dog. The next thing was the pain. His scalp ached from where he had been tugging harshly on his hair in his panicked state, and the rivets he had carved into his arms desperately, unseeing, stung something fierce. The third thing, was Niki.

She was crouched beside him, a warm, trembling hand laid firmly on his shoulder. Her eyes were full of regret and brimmed with tears, a couple of them managing to spill over onto flushed cheeks. Her pink hair was frizzy, like she had raked her hands through it far too many times.

"Niki?" He whimpered, reaching a hand out towards her form. She latched onto his shaking appendage, clutching it tight to her chest as she sobbed in relief.

"It's me, Toms. You're okay. You're safe, now. I promise."

"Dad?" He choked out next, curling into himself as best as he could, uncoordinated and shaken up as he was.

"He's not here right now. He's on his way, though. I called him." Niki let go of him for a single, terrifying moment, to take her brown, raggedy coat off (he could've sword he'd seen it somewhere before) to lay it over him. He leaned into the minimal contact, and then practically purred when he moved a hand to play with his hair.

"I'm so sorry, Toms. I didn't- I wasn't thinking straight," she sniffled.

"I's 'kay," he mumbled, letting his eyes close as he sank into the familiar warmth of his headspace now that he knew he was safe from Dream. "You di'n' know."

"I should've," she whispered, another broken sob leaving her lips. "I was wrong to assume. Notch, I'm so sorry baby."

Tommy really didn't know what she was apologizing for, but that was okay. He was away from Dream's clutches and in the care of his big sister.

"Hold?" He asked, hand outstretched toward her in question.

"Of course, Toms," she smiled shakily.

She leaned over him, scooping him up in her arms, coat still over him, letting him rest his head on her shoulder. He hummed happily, letting his eyes slip shut once more. He could feel her breathing from where he was pressed against her chest, and it was soothing, despite its unsteadiness.

"L've you," he murmured into her neck.

"I love you too, bud. I swear I'll protect you from now on. I mean it."

"Don't hafta. You'll get hurt."

"I've cared about that for far too long. I don't care about that anymore."

He let silence lull over them, calming their breaths and their hearths, the chill that came with it drying their tears. It was nice, really, despite why it had occurred. It was like a little bit of his past was still intact, still whole, despite it all. He had his big sister, and that's what mattered.

"Tommy!" Tubbo called, voice far, but close enough to where he could faintly hear the crunch of his boots in the snow. He only opened his eyes when he could feel his hands on his back, his warmth close.

"Hi, 'Bo," he smiled sleepily. He was tired. He wanted to nap, right here in Niki's arms.

"Tubbo! What happened?" Jack wheezed as he came to a halt, feet skidding slightly.

"I thought I told you to stay back at the site, Jack Manifold," Tubbo stated firmly, bordering the edge of anger.

"I- well- you know-"

"I'm not doing this anymore, Jack," Niki huffed, holding Tommy tighter to her.

"I- what?" He stuttered, taking a step back, seemingly involuntarily.

"I won't kill him! He's a kid!" She cried, staring the man straight in his heterochromatic glasses with all the conviction she could muster.

An explanation would be nice, Mr. Manifold," Tubbo interjected, face painted with barely concealed fury.

That wasn't right. Tubbo shouldn't be mad. Niki and Jack were their friends! They were all friends... right?

"Bo!" He babbled, reaching out towards his caregiver. Maybe the teen just needed a hug!

"Oh, Toms," he breathed, taking the little from Niki's arms, tucking his head into his coat clad chest. "I've got you now, bubs. You're okay."

"Why fight? Friends!"

"I know, Toms. I'll tell you when you're big, okay?" He carded a hand through his blonde hair, gently scratching his scalp, soothing the dull ache that he hadn't realized had become constant.

"I'll deal with Jack for now, okay Tubbs?" Niki smiled, laying a hand on both of their shoulders. "I know I messed up, but I won't let it continue, alright? I swear to you."

"I'll hold you to that," was the last thing Tubbo said before Niki dragged Jack off into the woods, the man protesting all the way.

Tommy let himself bask in the new warmth that Tubbo provided, Niki's coat still draped gently over him. He could faintly hear Tubbo's heartbeat through all the layers he wore, and it was nice. It was strong and steady, a comforting presence in the disaster the last... however long had been.

"Your dad should be here soon!" Tubbo tried to sound upbeat, falling just this side of flat. "Isn't that exciting, bubs?"

"Mhm. You smell like gunpowder."

"I know, bud. I'm sorry."

"You make thing go boom?"

"I did. I'm sorry. Jack said the area was clear."

"Dad when?"

"He should be here soon. I-"

"Toms!" The creeper hybrid in question called as soon as he landed, quickly tucking the trident back into his inventory.

"Daddy!" Tommy perked up immediately, making grabby hands towards his caregiver.

Tubbo immediately relinquished his hold, letting Tommy be scooped up into Sam's arms. He giggled as he was lifted into the air, wrapping his arms around the hybrid's neck without hesitation.

"Hey, bubba. What happened?" Sam questioned as they all began the trek back to Tubbo's cabin, as it would've been nonsensical to go anywhere else.

"Thing go boom!" He exaggerated the word by making a big motion with his hands, acting like something exploded. "I got scared, but i's okay! Big sis Niki was there to save the day!" He giggled even more as he finished his story, leaving out all the bits that caused him to regress in the first place- the bits that made Tubbo and Sam come running as if their lives depended on it.

"Wow! That must've been really scary, bud!"

"Mhm!"

They lapsed into silence for the rest of the walk, Tommy quickly beginning to fall back asleep, the gentle rocking that Sam walking produced not helping in the slightest. He did his best to stay awake, though, fiddling with Sam's clothes and messing with the creeper's faded green hair.

"Just a few more minutes and then you can nap, I promise," Sam whispered as Tubbo opened to door to his cabin. Immediately, the warmth of the fire seeped into his bones, making his head feel even fuzzier than before. He shoved his head into the crook of his caregiver's neck, groaning pitifully. He just wanted to take a nap. He was so _tired_.

"We just need to get you into your jammies, okay?" Sam cooed, running a hand over his back soothingly.

He was sat down on his bed- the one reserve specifically for him when he visited Tubbp- and he resisted every instinct in him that begged him to just lay down and pass out. He let his damp shirt be removed so his soft, red, oversized one could replace it. he did the same thing with his pants, helping Sam wriggle the fuzzy green bottoms on.

"Can I sleep now, daddy?" He whined, rubbing at his bleary eyes with a fist.

"Of course, bubba. I'll wake you in a few hours of dinner, alright?"

"M'kay," he mumbled, feeling his blankets be pulled up to his chin and tucked around him. He let his eyes fall closed one last time, sleep claiming him like an old friend. Maybe dad would let him play with Niki later.

**Author's Note:**

> sexualize the word daddy and you will wish I had stopped at stealing your kneecaps


End file.
